


Distance

by cosmicacti



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebellion Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Canon Compliant, Crushes, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff, Gay, Gay Panic, Hugs, Kallus POV?, M/M, Overthinking, Possible Fluff, Rebels, Romantic Fluff, Secret Crush, Slow Build?, Star Wars Rebels: Spark of Rebellion, Star Wars References, Star Wars: Rebels References, Star Wars: Rebels Spoilers, Zeb POV, gay night time overthinking, no beta we die like men, probably the beginning of something chaotic, slow burn?, uhhh its kinda gay?, writing gay sappy scenes is too fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:47:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28454094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmicacti/pseuds/cosmicacti
Summary: Zeb's memories of that night weren't as cold as it was on the moon. He knows he did the right thing in the end, letting Kallus go, but the cost was a bond Zeb wasn’t ready to accept.
Relationships: Alexsandr Kallus & Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios, Alexsandr Kallus/Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios
Comments: 30
Kudos: 69





	1. Ice

**Author's Note:**

> So... this is the first time I've written a fanfiction in years, let alone post one.
> 
> This fic started out as a joke idea between me and my sister, then I started coming up with legit ideas and now I'm on AO3.
> 
> I originally wrote this just to be one chapter, BUT I'm leaving it open to more. I'm still watching Rebels for the first time, so PLEASE no spoilers in the comments as of right now. We'll see if inspiration strikes me again to write another (or more?) chapters.
> 
> Also! This fic starts right before the Zeb and droid episode in Season 3 (I think it's around the middle of the season? I forget what episode it is lol)
> 
> So for anyone who reads this, enjoy! I'm still shocked I got this much inspiration from a Star Wars kids show lol.

Zeb sighed. As if he was waiting for something. Probably something impossible.

His gaze was fixed on the unresponsive bunk above him, his inability to sleep eating at him. He pretends he doesn’t know the answer about why everything has felt a little more fuzzy than usual. He’s not sick, that’s something he knows for sure, but it’s something he refuses to address. Something he doesn’t want to look in the eyes.

He rubs his hands over his face, gently groaning at his uncontrolled thoughts taking over. Since when had he become such an overthinker? He’s always been an ask questions later kind of guy; why are his nights possessed with thoughts and moments being fidgeted in his brain? 

He knows exactly why. In fact, he knows exactly who. He just doesn’t like to say it. 

Zeb turns to his side, the blankets over him getting slightly strewn. He tucks his hands underneath his head and looks at the door ahead of him. The Ghost was relatively quiet around this time; they were spending the night at Chopper Base so the humming of the ship’s systems was absent. The dim night lights were the only reminder people still resided there. 

He wouldn’t be surprised if Sabine was still awake, painting some kind of Imperial tool or armor. She had always been a night owl like he was, always looking for the next project to busy her hands. He could hear Ezra and Kanan stirring some nights too, finding some kind of Jedi business to discuss. Hera was the only one who slept consistently; she had a large responsibility to the rebel cell and the Ghost crew after all. 

His found family always made Zeb smile, knowing there would be people always there for him, no matter what shenanigans he got himself involved in. Or who he got himself involved with. 

The distraction was brief, but his thoughts always drifted back to him. To Kallus. The name itself made Zeb shudder. Saying his name was a step towards accepting his feelings. Something he continues to avoid.

Even though it had been about two cycles, nights like this still kept Zeb awake. These moments were becoming more frequent. All from the one unassuming night that proved to be life changing. 

His memories of it weren't as cold as it was on that moon. He knows he did the right thing in the end, letting him go, but the cost was a bond Zeb wasn’t ready to accept. 

And now he’s Fulcrum. One stupid night was enough to push him to change his outlook on the Empire he’s spent years fighting for. He threw away countless hours of training and brainwashing, risking his life to become a rebel just because of one night. That only proved as confirmation that night meant something to him too. Something that still baffled Zeb.

'So I guess we’re friends now?'

Were they? 

He couldn’t focus here. Cooped up in his small and seemingly barren room alone with his thoughts was enough to drive anyone insane. 

Pushing himself up from his bed, he paced himself to the door, finger clumsy hitting the button to open the door. He hoped no one heard the loud creak of metal as the door threw itself open and shut behind Zeb. He headed to the bridge, surprisingly drowsy for someone who hadn’t had a bit of shut-eye. 

The landscape of Chopper Base sat monochromatic under the night’s subtle light, the gently rolling hills being the only thing breaking up the horizon. The lenient moonlight dusted over the controls and seats in the cockpit, accenting the ship’s buttons and Sabine’s graffiti. Zeb settled in one of the second row seats and laid back, the metal gently straining at his weight. While his eyes were set aimlessly on the planet’s view through the window, his mind traveled parsecs back to that ice moon. 

The only reminder of life besides each other and the creature almost killing them was the light keeping them warm. It was an insignia of their survival. After the action settled, he remembered the small cave the two of them found to spend the rest of the night in. Exhaustion had finally hit them, especially Kallus, who seemed to be on the verge of collapsing from the cold. 

“Move that closer to you. You need it more,” Zeb huffed, scooting the light in the snow closer to Kallus.

He only nodded his head in response, too cold to argue.

They sat in the quiet for a bit, listening to the whistling wind and the aggressive snow fall. All they had to do was wait for the transponder to pick up anything, any kind of life to save them, no matter rebel or Empire. Any thoughts of who would find them didn’t even matter; all they wanted to do was get off the moon alive. 

The rustle of snow broke the silence and Zeb jumped at the feeling of a body against him. 

“It’s cold,” Kallus muttered, not meeting Zeb’s eyes. 

Zeb couldn’t even process the implications of what this meant, all thoughts were focused on the breathing body next to him. It was Kallus, the man that was a cornerstone of the Empire. Even though in the moment he addressed it, he knew that didn’t matter for their survival. The both of them had become incredibly open around each other, throwing down walls no one knew the contents behind in the face of death. 

Zeb took in a breath, attempting to calm his rapid, running thoughts. Trying to close off this side himself he’s never met. Who even was this Zeb? Since when was he so concerned about someone touching him? 

This felt different than some kind of victory gesture, or even survival. It felt vulnerable. Something Zeb wasn’t very familiar with. He knows how to be tough, and how to put up a face and a fight, but finding moments to show people himself was far and few in-between. Let alone with someone he considered an enemy. 

Kallus’ move felt like an action of choice rather than necessity. 

Zeb decided to reciprocate this feeling by resting his head on Kallus’ shoulders. He jumped slightly, but didn’t fight nor say anything. All he did in response was slowly rest his head on top of Zeb’s.

He didn’t know if this was the exhaustion speaking or something he was just beginning to feel. The latter seemed more viable. And it was… kind of awkward. At first anyway. The two began to get familiar with each other’s touch. It was comforting knowing someone else was with Zeb on this desolate moon. Slowly, the feeling of vulnerability became less uncomfortable and increasingly mutual.

Even though Kallus was a hard lined agent of the Empire, he seemed gentle in that moment. Just as vulnerable as Zeb was feeling. He wasn’t even familiar with these kinds of feelings, let alone someone else reciprocating them. While Zeb’s feelings were unusual for him, they also weren’t unwelcome. They didn’t know how long they were going to be stuck on this moon. For all he knew it could be rotations, something he didn’t know if he and Kallus could survive. This exposure felt justified, Zeb finally reasoned with himself. 

Zeb could feel Kallus relaxing above him, his body slowing itself to sleep. Zeb himself was beginning to grow drowsy. However, Kallus decided to let one more phrase slip his lips before accepting sleep.

“Thank you, Zeb.” 

Those words stuck with him, one thing that was highlighted in Zeb’s memory of that night. Thank you Zeb. Kallus becoming Fulcrum only proved that he really meant them. While Zeb understood he had shown Kallus something, he didn’t fully understand what. Zeb knew that he helped change Kallus’ mind on the Empire after learning about his new secret identity, but he still struggled to figure out what ultimately changed his mind. Kallus had so much working for the Empire, and now he’s suddenly realized their hypocrisy. 

The scenery of Atollon was nothing like the moon, but the gentle wash of night was enough to let him reminisce. Even though Zeb still needed time to sink in that Kallus was Fulcrum, the feeling of Kallus next to him was something his mind still couldn’t shake. It was something he wasn’t used to. And the thing Zeb refuses to address was if he wants to feel it again. 

And he knows that answer. 

Zeb shook his head, snapping himself out of his deep thoughts. I need to reel myself back, he told himself. I’m here for the Rebel cause, for something I believe in. 

And not for a chance to see Kallus again. 

Zeb groaned, rubbing his face and slumping in his seat. He needs to sleep. He doesn’t know what tomorrow is going to bring him or the other rebels. 

He adjusts himself, finally finding a comfortable spot to lay, and then wraps his arms around himself. He shuts his eyes, trying to surrender to the subtle feeling of exhaustion. Don’t think of him, he repeats. 

His head on top of his own. The warmth of his body.

Don’t think of him.

His unusually gentle demeanor. The fact he joined the rebels because of him. 

Thank you Zeb.

\- - -

“Zeb, are you okay?”

“Karabast!” Zeb jolted from his seat, and turned around to see Hera, looking slightly concerned. “I’m okay,” he reassured, recognizing Hera’s anxiety. “Just couldn’t sleep.” 

“I was worried someone got on our ship. I’m glad it’s only you,” Hera relaxes, gently smiling. 

“Sorry for worrying you Hera,” Zeb gets up, back sore from the uncomfortable seat, and stretches. She gently shakes her head to let Zeb know she isn’t upset. 

“Just make sure you’re ready for the day,” she says before heading out of the bridge back to her own room with the metal door closing behind her as evidence. 

Zeb headed back to his own room, not wanting to spend any more time lingering in the cockpit. Hera was right; there was a day to begin and an Empire to defeat. 

Behind closed doors, he relaxed for a moment, leaning against his door and closing his eyes. As if on cue, his thoughts from last night began to trail into the new day. Fulcrum. The night on the ice moon. Zeb’s feelings about him. 

Pull yourself together, he ordered himself, pulling his back off the wall and hoping that the task of getting himself ready for the day would put his mind off of the previous night. 

Instead of being a distraction, Zeb’s feelings found his way to infiltrate into his morning routine, even if there was absolutely no relation. All he could think about was that night, his touch, and his betrayal of the Empire. Because of him. 

Zeb only wanted to get through a day without the constant distraction of Kallus in his head. Something that has become increasingly impossible. A regular thought can easily find its way back into Zeb’s overthinking. He hadn’t even begun to unpack his deeper feelings towards him; that one night had already proved itself overwhelming enough. He knew if he found more things to think about than he already does, his already descending focus would hit rock bottom. 

This was enough. This was as far as he could go. 

Zeb’s day was relatively underwhelming, or at least much more than usual. The rest of the Ghost squad was sent on a training mission that Zeb was told he couldn’t be a part of. While Zeb was slightly hurt by this, he knew what needed to be taken care of at the base and obliged. He spent most of his day with droids, eventually finding an abandoned protocol droid Zeb decided would be a useful rebel companion. Other than that, just another day at Chopper Base. 

Zeb made his way to the central command center after being told there was an important message. He didn’t think of it as much; all of the droid drama has kept his mind preoccupied regarding the feelings he’s been avoiding. Even in this moment with his thoughts, Zeb spent his time running through the items that needed to be taken care of at the base. 

“Sir, we have a message from Fulcrum,” was what Zeb was greeted with upon entering the command center. Zeb’s focus immediately broke when remembering his personal association with Fulcrum. 

But Zeb was able to keep his cool. After all, he was on a duty of business. “Let’s hear it. Put him through.” There were several Fulcrum agents, that doesn’t mean it’s who he thinks it is. Right?

When Fulcrum started by discussing Empire droids, Zeb knew exactly who he was speaking to. Zeb pushed down his feelings before they had a chance to fester. Maybe it’s better that he doesn’t know Zeb’s on the other side of the transmission. 

Zeb was able to maintain focus, but barely. He caught on that the droid he found today was an Empire droid, and it was dangerous, but his thoughts also managed to be in another place. Fulcrum left as quickly as he came, but the weight of what Zeb felt sat with him. 

It was Kallus. Still continuing to risk his life for the rebels. Because of Zeb. 

Zeb finally let his thoughts run on his way to warn the droids about his findings. Fulcrum was undeniable proof that Zeb had a big part to play regarding his turn. Everything felt different after that night. Zeb had befriended someone from the Empire, and the opposite went for Kallus. Both of their eyes were opened, and in more ways than one. Not only had Zeb learned more about those groomed by the Empire, he felt emotions he hadn’t had time to even think about. And in the middle of a rebellion nonetheless. 

Why did one person, one moment, suddenly change everything? Zeb knew he had been acting different ever since the ice moon incident. He had been much more quiet, and a little more thoughtful. Of course, he still was the same old Zeb, but he had taken a step back. Most of the missions the rebels took put more stress on Hera, Kanan, or Ezra, which gave Zeb more time on his own; something he needed after his world was rocked. 

Zeb recognized the storage containers, knowing he was near the droids. Focus. 

This has nothing to do with Fulcrum. 

Chopper Base lived to see another day. 

After an elaborate incident with trying to remove the Imperial droid from rebel territory, Zeb and the other droids were able to bring it back to the Empire with an additional explosive surprise. Fulcrum praised the team for their work, leaving Zeb satisfied. He was happy to have a moment where his thoughts weren’t constantly distracted. With the Ghost squad having returned, things began to settle down for the night. 

Even though he spent a nice evening relaxing with the other rebels, Zeb wasn’t ready to spend agonizing hours alone, having the same moment stuck on repeat in his mind. There was still gentle bustle in the Ghost, so he felt alright to spend some time outside with the ship. 

Zeb sat in the rust-colored sand, legs sprawled out in front of him, watching the remaining speckles of sunset grace the horizon. While the majority of sky was painted a rich navy, there were still amber remnants as a reminder of the early evening.

Although his external demeanor seemed serene, his mind was stuck in a windy, white snowstorm, and his thoughts slammed the ground like violently falling snowflakes. Why did he decide to become Fulcrum? Do I want to see him again? How does Kallus feel about me? 

That last one was new. 

Zeb knew Kallus had some amount of respect towards him; he proved it by not killing him. But how deep that respect ran was a whole new issue to explore. The more Zeb thought about Kallus, the more he began to respect the way he was treated. Most Imperial agents would have found some way to try to kill a Lasat. And not only was Zeb a Lasat, he was also a high target rebel. But instead, Kallus picked his battle against nature rather than a battle that felt insignificant in the face of survival. And in turn the two learned more about each other than most knew. 

Alone in the moment, Zeb realized maybe he does want what happened with Kallus again. Not with the high stakes survival motive, but something natural. It’s something Zeb doesn’t want to accept, especially with how unlikely it would happen. He fights the urge to create any kind of comforting fantasies, as that would only leave him even more distracted than he already is. As much as he would like to let his mind fully wander, he knows it isn’t the best idea. 

But… Zeb isn’t known for making incredibly guided decisions. Even though his discipline has brought him this far, something in the back of his head is telling him to break it. To let his mind go. 

Zeb closes his eyes and takes in a deep breath. 

Hugging Kallus if he ever sees him again. Most likely in private. Letting his hands rest above his waist and settling his face into his shoulders. Being held back. Just feeling Kallus’ presence again would be enough. Being in the same space with him. Hugging Kallus, even if it’s for gratitude. Hugging Kallus.

Then-

No. No, no, no. That’s somewhere Zeb isn’t ready to mentally go yet. He pushed himself too far already. 

His eyes peel open to meet a gentle royal blue sky, scattered with stars. Imagining Kallus was with him. 

Zeb took in a breath. He was tired. He was letting his thoughts go too far just because of the stressful events of the day. He just needed to sleep. 

He pulled himself up from the ground, locking eyes with the night sky. Kallus had spent so much time gracing Zeb’s thoughts he hadn’t wanted to think about what it would be like if he was there. It would be impossible, yes, but something Zeb now knew he wanted.

He wanted to see Kallus again.


	2. Rock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus knew being in the same room with Zeb was currently out of the question, much less starting something with him. In fact, he wasn’t sure if Zeb felt the same as he did. Sure, when Kallus decided to make a move Zeb returned the favor, but was that enough?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually wrote another chapter! I have plans for a couple more chapters actually, so this thing is not over by any means. 
> 
> I decided to switch POV for this chapter and mess around with some Kallus stuff! Had a lot of fun doing it too. 
> 
> Also I promise the gay overthinking openings will stop after this one. I hope 0_0. 
> 
> And thanks for everyone who's checked out the fic so far from the hits to the kudos, hope you stick around! Nice to know there's a Rebels fandom still kicking.
> 
> Enjoy!

Kallus’ body immediately relaxed as he clicked off the transmitter and the room was quickly engulfed in darkness. The dancing Fulcrum symbol disappeared, eliminating any trace of why Kallus was here.

He wasn’t ready to leave the room, not yet. His transmission was kept short this time around, so he didn’t think some extra time alone would hurt. After all, moments alone like this were rare when living in a massive Imperial base. He knew no one would come after him here; in fact no one even cared where he was. He was a high ranking officer anyway and he knew no one would take the risk to question him. . 

This double life Kallus lived, while liberating, was more stressful than any rebel fight he was involved with. Any sly smile, any eye roll was enough for him to get caught and immediately questioned. He’s learned to keep any kind of expression on lockdown, panic constantly in check. After all, that’s what he learned in interrogation training; he was just using the Empire’s own teachings back at them. 

While Kallus enjoyed helping the rebels in this way, he had dreams that he regarded as foolish, impossible even. He was able to see the true pain the Empire was causing, and he definitely was fighting for that, but there were more personal reasons buried beneath the surface. 

He wants people in his life. Some kind of family even. 

That last goal was what especially seemed impossible to Kallus, but at the same time was something that pushed his every action towards the rebellion. Working for the Empire, he never realized how being lonely bothered him so much. His instructors constantly told him he worked better alone, in turn leaving him incredibly isolated in his work and life. Everyday spent tracking down the rebels was just another day he spent living a lonely lie. 

Until he was shown something different. 

Kallus’ eyes ran across the transmitter box, a seemingly insignificant piece of technology that gave him something he never knew he wanted. He was quickly reminded of huddling around the frozen transponder, the moment where the rebellion didn’t matter. When for the first time in his life he wasn’t alone. 

He saw that while the rebels were fighting just as much as he was, they were fighting together. It was a choice they had, and something they took with eagerness. Instead of being told to fight alone for a convoluted cause, they fought together for the truth. While Kallus didn’t fully understand what they wanted to do if they did take down the Empire, their comradery was enough to draw Kallus in. 

He wanted to thank Zeb for what he showed Kallus. He had already once, before he had a chance to understand what Zeb really gave him. 

Zeb gave him life. A chance to share who he was. 

Kallus knew where he wanted to start his family with. But it seemed like another impossible dream. Being in the same room with Zeb was out of the question, much less starting something with him. In fact, he wasn’t sure if Zeb felt the same as he did. Sure, when Kallus decided to make a move Zeb returned the favor, but was that enough? 

He remembers Zeb’s initial gruffness, how unhappy he was to be stuck with Kallus, to which Kallus felt the same about Zeb. It was an unlikely pair in an unlikely situation. But Zeb’s moral code let Kallus see another day, and eventually the incident turned more into just personal codes. Not only did Zeb let Kallus live and took care of him, but he trusted him. The faith Zeb put into him was something Kallus had never experienced. He was so used to being treated skeptically and to be constantly doubted in his work that having an enemy trust him was nothing like anything he ever experienced. 

And the crazier thing was Kallus trusted him back.

These two cycles really did something to him. He figured out what he really wanted, and he knew he could die with truths open to himself rather than fight for a lie. 

Kallus remembered he was on a clock at Lothal in the middle of the night. He rarely gave himself these moments to think due to the risk of them, but sometimes his thoughts got the best of him. As they did to any rebel. 

Reluctantly, Kallus peeled himself from the uncomfortable stool beneath him, scanning the room before heading outside on the tower’s balcony. The distant city subtly sparkled, the only reminder that he could still be found. He was appalled that he was able to spend this much time at this abandoned communication tower already. The fact that no Imperial had bothered to repair the tower was just an insignificant spot on the Empire’s self proclaimed plans. 

I reminded himself again; he needed to go. 

\- - -

“Karabast, karabast” Kallus repeatedly muttered under his breath, turning on his speeder in urgency. With the sound of the speeder reeving to life, he slammed his foot on the pedal and began his final ride to Fulcrum headquarters. 

Kallus didn’t care how suspicious he looked rushing out of the Lothal base with panicked fervor. The wind beating his face felt like a continuous slap on how he’d been compromised. But he was going to get to the tower. 

Not a single thought ran straight in his mind. His thoughts blended between curses and increasing concern. All he knew was to tell the Rebels it slipped. Thrawn knew. 

The past few days Kallus had felt more than safe in his secrecy with Fulcrum. It was almost too good the more he realized. He had spying routines down and was able to give the rebels consistent information about all sorts of Empire plans. However, he underestimated Thrawn until it was too late. Hope if getting anything through was seemingly lost. 

Not if Kallus could help it. 

He was going to get this transmission through. He was going to make something right.

Rushing across the fields of Lothal, Chopper Base being exposed and his identity as Fulcrum being exposed weren’t the only things crossing his mind. The rebels. The base. Zeb. 

The last thing he wanted was to lose him. 

Any kind of dream Kallus held on to was being quickly washed away by the reality of Thrawn finding out. Physically joining the rebels was something that seemed unfeasible now. If it was impossible before it definitely was after this. 

He doesn’t want to be the reason Chopper Base was destroyed. He doesn’t want the rebels to lose trust in him at the wrong moment. The rebels need to stay as safe as I can make them, he told himself, trying to find any kind of hope in his dire situation. Any kind of chance that they can stay alive. He’s the only person who can give them that extra luck at this moment. 

He could see the tower quickly approaching in the distance, standing in the field as his beacon of hope. Even if he could get a sentence out to them, it would be enough. While it wouldn’t be a lot of time to prepare, it would be better than Thrawn appearing and destroying their base before they had a chance to know he was there. 

The last thing he wanted the rebels to lose to was the element of surprise. In fact, he didn’t want to lose them at all. 

Kallus brought the speeder to a grinding halt at the base of the tower, and quickly climbed up with anxious dexterity. The air was unusually still for Lothal, the plants stood stagnant in response to his panicked climbing. Usually, the royal blue Lothal sky was a comforting sight for him, but instead it felt cold and unforgiving, closing in on him as if it knew what was happening. 

Kallus ran through his head what he could tell the rebels to keep them alive. He had to mention Thrawn, so that they knew they weren’t dealing with just some random admirals fresh from the academy. They needed to know to plan accordingly. Kallus had underestimated Thrawn once, and he didn’t want the rebels to fall into the same mistake. 

When he reached the balcony, he tried slowing his breathing in an attempt to calm himself down. He wasn’t shaking, but just felt unstable, unprepared. Kallus never got any kind of warning or protocol if he were to be exposed, just to “stand his ground.” Like I wasn’t planning to do that, his thoughts hissed. 

He slammed his hand on the entry keypad, the door opening with efficient urgency. The room stood dark as always, and Kallus cautiously scanned for any intruders. The tower seemed empty, the only faces staring back at him were the collected trooper helmets, so he proceeded on to the transmitter. 

As calmly as he could, he flicked on all the needed switches and buttons and the comforting Fulcrum symbol popped up. A chance he was still able to do something. 

He breathed in, preparing to fit as many words as he could in this transmission. 

He needed to help them.

“This is Fulcrum with an urgent message. Thrawn knows about-”

The Fulcrum symbol grew red and grainy as quickly as it appeared. 

Kallus jumped, and immediately quickened his hands to see what was interfering with the transmission. But his typical fix worked to no avail. 

A voice on his right rang through his ears, overwhelming Kallus with a sense of dread. That eloquent, deep voice was the farthest thing from comforting.

“By the light of Lothal’s moons.”

\- - -

He was alive. They were alive. 

Well, most of them. Many rebels made sacrifices in order to keep the survivors safe, but the rebel cell was still intact. In shambles, but intact. 

Kallus barely escaped his capture from the Empire, and the rebels ended up taking him on one of their ships. The Ghost in fact. The fact he managed to get on the ship baffled him. He recognized the ship immediately despite his dire situation in the escape pod. And he knew exactly who was on there.

Kallus stood in the back of the ship, not wanting to interfere with their grieving. It wasn’t his place to get involved just yet, in fact he would feel worse if he did. He knows the rebels still didn’t fully trust him, and he doesn’t want to push his boundaries. 

He couldn’t believe the impossible unfolded right in front of his eyes. He was on the Ghost. He was actually with the rebels now, not just a mole. And there was no chance the Empire would take him back. 

Kallus was comforted by that last thought. Absolutely no way to go back to the lifestyle he dreaded. He was given a chance to be free, to not be alone. 

And he wasn’t going to waste it. 

Kallus did feel out of place, intruding on this rebel family, but the last thing he wanted to do was push himself away. They just needed time, and that was something he understood. All he could do was offer his thanks for the rebels taking him in. Kanan had personally thanked Kallus for what he did for the rebellion, which made him feel needed. He had more purpose with the rebels than he ever did with the Empire. 

Things began to wind down as much as they could on the Ghost. Kallus knew they were on their way to a new location through the other rebels’ murmuring, and possibly a new base. The majority of the rebels decided to rest, since it would be awhile before they needed to stop. Kallus had too much on his mind to sleep, so he chose to settle in the small sitting area by the cabin. 

A couple things sat in Kallus’ mind. First off, what was next? He wasn’t sure if the rebels had any kind of backup plan or base , so he couldn’t even try to guess how safe they were. He knew they were in a vulnerable position, and in no way ready to fight. Thrawn knows the blow he made, even if it wasn’t as devastating as he planned. The rebels needed time to recover, time Kallus wasn’t confident they had.

The second was where his focus primarily lay. Zeb. Zeb was here, on this ship. He saw him, a quick glimpse when staring at the damage being done to their base, but that was it. Kallus wasn’t sure to take his chances approaching Zeb himself, or let Zeb take his time. Their last physical interaction was a note that wasn’t left lightly, and he didn’t know how much Zeb took in. He knew it impacted the both of them, that he was confident in, but exactly what was where it got tricky. 

Thankfully, Kallus didn’t have to ask himself many more questions.

“Hey,” the familiar gruff voice greeted him, something he hadn’t heard in cycles, making Kallus jump. 

Zeb stood in front of him, looking relatively beat up and tired. His violet fur lay slightly ruffled and his pointed ears hung back. His striking green eyes were worn with exhaustion and his clothes were littered with dust and debris. While he wore the battle-torn look well, he looked shy standing in front of Kallus. He seemed softer, more gentle than when he last saw him. That was strange for Kallus to admit knowing Zeb’s role with the Ghost crew. 

“Hey Zeb,” Kallus finally snapped himself from looking at Zeb and focused, his name leaving his tongue instinctually. Zeb gently reacted to hearing his name, his ears twitching slightly.

Zeb decided to slide in the empty space next to Kallus, settling into the seat quite comfortably. Kallus couldn’t believe it was Zeb seated next to him, who he doubted he would ever see again. He had so much he wanted to tell him, but knew he couldn’t dive too quickly. He had to take his time, learn exactly what he was getting into. Even though he was more than happy with who he knows Zeb to be already. 

“Just wanted to thank you, for your work as Fulcrum, er-, Kallus,” Zeb stated, breaking the silence. 

Hearing his name leave from Zeb was something he wasn’t used to. Kallus could tell Zeb was somewhat awkward, his exhaustion blending into his demeanor, but he meant what he said. Zeb always meant what he said. 

Kallus only nodded his head in response, then looked down at the table beneath him. He had to pinpoint where he wanted to start with Zeb. Ultimately, he picked where their relationship began. 

“I should’ve taken your offer on the moon, to join the rebels,” Kallus started. The deeper Kallus got into being Fulcrum, the more he spent thinking about it. He could have saved so much time going off with the rebels then instead of torturing himself for cycles. But in turn, he would’ve lost his experiences as Fulcrum, something that both hurt and helped Kallus. 

“You did what you felt was right. That’s something I can’t argue with,” Zeb replied, reacting like Kallus’ words were an apology. 

Kallus looked up at Zeb, and Zeb was… peaceful. Kallus couldn’t pinpoint why though. It could just be the exhaustion blending through the both of them, especially after the stress of the day. Zeb’s eyes darted back and forth from Kallus to other parts of the ship, but his body language said otherwise. He was laid back quite comfortably and slouched in a natural posture. 

While the words sat in the room felt awkward, the both of them were too tired to care. Kallus was just thankful to have Zeb at his side again, to not be alone anymore. 

“It’s… uh, nice having you here,” Zeb broke the small riff of silence. Kallus felt there was a hidden weight to his words, something he didn’t know about. He didn’t want to poke at Zeb too hard anyway. 

“It’s nice to be here,” Kallus responded warmly, barely missing a beat. The awkward expression on Zeb’s face softened, making Kallus smile. 

The two looked at each other, meeting each other eye to eye genuinely for the first time. Kallus felt safe in Zeb’s presence, finally able to dive a little deeper into Zeb’s trust in him. Kallus knew it would be awhile before he could pinpoint Zeb’s trust in him. Maybe it was just Zeb’s moral code speaking for itself incredibly loudly in his actions. 

But he was here. Zeb sat next to Kallus, opening himself up with the same vulnerability he received on the ice moon. Even though he sat in next to him, just thinking about Zeb put a gentle smile on Kallus’ face. Zeb reciprocated the gesture immediately, with the smile plastered almost goofily on his face. It’s cute, Kallus decided, the words panging at his heart. It was something he never gave himself the chance to admit, nor had the chance to confess it to himself. He was cute. 

The moment then shattered as quickly as it came. “I should probably go get some shut-eye,” Zeb said, more as a reminder to himself rather than something Kallus needed to know. Kallus wished he could stare at Zeb’s adorable smile a little while longer, but knew it was better for the two of them to sleep. Kallus only nodded his head while Zeb scooted himself out from the seat, then Kallus decided to follow suit. 

Zeb sighed, his exhaustion seeping through his bones once more. “Good night Kallus,” the words spilled out of his mouths awkwardly, but laced with truth. Instead of immediately responding, Kallus tasked himself with a decision. A decision that would be based on impulse or reason.

Karabast, why not?

Kallus brought himself forward and rested his head on Zeb’s chest, locking his arms around the small of Zeb’s back. Zeb gently flinched, and stood for a moment, seemingly shocked from the gesture. 

Kallus was worried he made the wrong move. The last thing he wanted was to upset Zeb, and would be absolutely devastated if he did. Kallus ran through apologies or anyway to make things right if Zeb was upset. 

Instead, Zeb’s arms found his way around Kallus, slightly squeezing him with his strong grip. 

Kallus had never felt so physically safe or protected before. Having a smaller stature compared to Zeb barely bothered him, and it only quickly flitted his mind in the moment. Kallus relaxed almost immediately, letting the intimacy wash over him. 

“Good night Zeb. Thank you,” Kallus practically whispered into the cloth of Zeb’s shirt, and Zeb’s grip growing a touch stronger was an indication he heard him. Being properly listened to was something Kallus wasn’t even used to. 

The two stood in this position for a while, awkwardly unmoving but at the same time soaking up the moment as much as they could. Kallus didn’t want to leave Zeb’s warm embrace, and Zeb didn’t seem to have any indication of wanting to leave either. The pause in action allowed the two of them to be vulnerable again, making Kallus practically melt from the emotions he had been dying to feel again. 

Zeb felt strong, unmoving, and most importantly safe. Kallus had found some kind of rock in his life he refused to let go. 

However, Zeb made the first move to end the moment, practically having to peel himself from Kallus’ embrace before Kallus understood what was happening. Kallus jumped at the realization of how deep he got in the moment. He had never lost himself so deep in a moment before, something Kallus never had the luxury of. Every emotion Kallus had wanted to properly feel had ended up boiling over through the course of a night. 

“Good night,” Zeb repeated, and Kallus looked up to see the embarrassed face of a soldier. Kallus couldn’t drop the gentle grin off his face once more as Zeb quickly met his eyes before finally pushing himself to leave the room.

“Good night,” Kallus reciprocated, watching Zeb’s eyes jump from Kallus to around the room, and then he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed! What I was going for in Kallus' POV was definitely not my strong suit but finally writing a scene with Zeb and Kallus actually interacting made up for it. 
> 
> Also I'll try to stop rewriting small parts from the show, I like using it to lead into things but after this chapter things are gonna be a little different.
> 
> I forgot to mention in last chapter I totally forgot Zeb and Ezra share a room lol. Just roll with it; I think Ezra and Kanan would spend late nights vibing anyway.
> 
> I'm currently publishing this at around 3 AM after just finishing writing and I'm so tired. But I can't be dragged out of gay hell, I had too much fun writing the hug scene.


	3. Heat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus wasn’t done. He turned his head to face Zeb, glancing down at the ground quickly before meeting him in the eyes. “Let me ask, Zeb, what that night meant to you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eyyyy, new chapter! Wanted to mention the elemental titles for each chapter really doesn't mean much, it was completely unintentional tbh. 
> 
> Also I was wondering if you guys were interested in hearing the playlist I made for this fic. It doesn't fit perfectly into everything, but some of the songs do relate and they're just some nice gay vibes. I can link it next chapter. 
> 
> Thanks again for all the hits, kudos , and comments btw! For this being my first piece of writing I've put out there, it seriously means a lot <3
> 
> That's enough of me, enjoy another chapter of our favorite gay space disasters.

Zeb and Kallus’ friendship grew increasingly intimate after settling on Yavin 4 from that first night.

It had been a good handful of rotations but the rebels had quickly adapted to their new base. The planet was spilling with life, covered in vegetation and surrounded with a lush shield of trees. It was definitely a step up from the dry scenery of Atollon, and while Zeb still needed more time to call it home, he was more than happy to be there. 

Kallus grew increasingly comfortable in his new rebel life, as Zeb began to notice his unruly hair and the bits of stubble gracing his chin. Kallus was also finally freed from his stuffy Imperial uniform, trading it for some more casual and discrete attire. 

It was an understatement that the rebel look suited Kallus. In fact, Zeb had admitted to himself that Kallus looked great. And it wasn’t just his physicality, but his mannerisms became less reserved and closed off. He let smart remarks slip, greeted every rebel he passed even on the way to take care of simple tasks, and he even allowed himself to smile and laugh occasionally. His laugh was one of the many things that touched Zeb’s heart; while it still took its time being held back in nature, it was hearty and infectious. 

While a handful of rebels were still skeptical of having an ex-Imperial agent at their base, most were slowly but surely coming around to Kallus’ presence. Kallus and Zeb mainly took care of the maintenance and daily activity of the base, as it was a role familiar to Zeb and something easy to learn for Kallus. The two of them didn’t work together often, as the base was relatively large, but always exchanged greetings whenever they saw each other. What time they didn’t have during the day they usually made up for it after sunset when things wound down. 

Even though the two of them still teetered on the balance beam of awkwardness, they were slowly standing more steady. Their nights were usually spent talking about all sorts of missions and experiences they had, switching off from rebel to Imperial. Zeb recounted some of the many missions he went on with the Ghost crew while Kallus gave Zeb more insight into his lifestyle with the Empire. If anything, Kallus’ stories gave another reason for Zeb to hate the Empire and Zeb couldn’t help but feel awful for Kallus. The tales they told usually stayed surface level and recent; they hadn’t dove too deep into each other’s past. 

They learned they liked to spend nights outside, sometimes taking care of any maintenance work outside the base while they chatted. Zeb enjoyed the company he got from Kallus, and learned quickly how much of a diligent listener he was. Part of it might have something to do with his Imperial training, but Kallus was always invested in Zeb’s rambling, getting just as involved as he did when telling his own stories. Every night was always great from beginning to end, the latter something Zeb constantly looked forward to. 

In spending more time with Kallus, Zeb had admitted more things to himself, most of which hadn’t fully settled within him yet. He’s learned to catch on to the little things Kallus does, the small mannerisms that go unnoticeable to most, like how he always makes sure his hair sits more forward and when standing idle he tends to fidget with the hem of his gloves. Zeb didn’t know how deep he would fall for Kallus, but he showed no signs of stopping. 

This night was relatively calm regarding any simple tasks needed to close up the base for the night, so Kallus and Zeb found a spot by the large pillars marking the entrance of the base and sat, leaning their backs against the cold stone. The light of dusk still washed over the base and the vast amount of stars broke up the sky. Kallus was finishing up another story of his while Zeb nodded attentively, gaze fixed on the distant trees. Zeb still wasn’t used to looking Kallus in the eyes and did it only sparingly, usually working off of quick glances. Thankfully, Kallus never ridiculed him for it; Zeb always added to the conversation to show he was listening. When Kallus finished speaking, Zeb responded with a chuckle and silence fell over the two of them. 

The wildlife buried in the trees were the only thing interrupting the quiet. Zeb glanced at Kallus, and the two of them met eyes briefly. He looked concerned; Zeb knew when to take the backseat as a listener but he knew he was being much more quiet than usual. 

Something bothered Zeb. A moment of time repeating in his mind. Except for Kallus mentioning it on his first night with the rebels, the two of them never talked about what actually happened that night. The night that started all of this. Kallus being Fulcrum, and now Kallus being here. Sat next to him. 

“Why did you join the rebels?” Zeb couldn’t help himself, turning his head to face Kallus. Zeb knew the reason why, but he wanted to hear it himself. Kallus’ words, not Zeb’s own thoughts. 

Zeb had caught Kallus off guard. He sat at a loss for words, then sighed and tore away his gaze from Zeb. That’s a first. 

“I joined because of what you gave me,” Kallus started, voice sounding far away. “I never thought I would have anything in common with the rebels. I was always told we were too different, and that the rebels were just something I needed to deal with. It wasn’t until I was in close quarters with one I knew exactly who rebels are.” He chuckled, almost to break up his words and give him a chance to breathe.

“I was told to be proud of what happened on Lasan, like it was some kind of medal. It wasn’t until I was stuck with you I accepted what a lie that was. I learned I had nothing to be proud of,” Kallus said, words heavy with brevity. 

Zeb could almost say the same. While his hatred for the Empire was a rock that would never leave, he learned not all of them were monsters. In fact, he learned that they could apologize. That they could change. 

Kallus brought one of his legs close to his chest and wrapped his arm around it, still staring off into the trees much like Zeb usually did. “After you left, that’s what I thought about. It wasn’t until a couple hours later the Empire found me. They didn’t even look at my leg, just told me to get back to my post. I-,” he stopped himself, as if he was interrupting himself. “I realized how alone I was,” his voice grew quieter, his head slightly hanging and eyes meeting the ground. 

Zeb himself was at loss for words. The Empire’s unempathetic response was typical for them, but Kallus’ last line is what struck a chord. The last thing Zeb thought Kallus was about was being lonely, but Zeb then realized the truth in Kallus’ words. The majority of his stories involved something he did on his own and he rarely mentioned any sort of help he got. Zeb’s life was constantly surrounded by people and family and he never thought about the opposite being true for Kallus. 

“Having someone who treated me like a person meant a lot, Zeb,” Kallus added, almost as an afterthought. 

Zeb’s thoughts stopped short. 

Someone who treated him like a person. Those words stuck out, like Kallus straight up told him the night on the ice moon meant something. Despite all the arguments and fights Zeb got in, he was usually treated with some kind of decency, save for the people he was fighting against. By the end of that night, even Kallus, who was his enemy, treated Zeb with respect. Kallus’ reasons for leaving finally dawned on Zeb, putting any remaining contemplation to a halt.

However, Kallus wasn’t done. He turned his head to face Zeb, glancing down at the ground quickly before meeting him in the eyes. “Let me ask, Zeb, what that night meant to you?” Kallus sounded like he was testing Zeb, wanting him to return the favor. The arm around Kallus’ leg found its way to the ground and Kallus’ fingers gently sat on top of Zeb’s. 

Zeb’s typical thoughts suddenly came rushing back as quickly as they left. 

Zeb felt a sudden urgency to stop. All he knew was that the night meant something, and he knew what it meant to Kallus. Sure, Zeb felt some of the reasons that Kallus felt, but he knew the difference of what that night gave Zeb. Zeb couldn’t even begin to fathom what Kallus’ hand on his meant. It could’ve just been a simple mistake, something Kallus was perfectly fine with. After all, he was the one who hugged him first. It could’ve just been his way of showing thanks. The way he’s wanted to show thanks to anyone. In fact, Kallus didn’t treat Zeb any different than any of the other rebels at the base. They just knew each other from one night, that was the only difference. 

He knew he couldn’t tell Kallus all the emotions he spurred in Zeb, and how they had no signs of stopping. He couldn’t tell Kallus how much he wanted him. 

What that night gave Zeb was Kallus. 

He wanted Kallus. He wanted to be with him. 

Zeb had crossed the line. 

This realization was something Zeb couldn’t let slip. He couldn’t let his words flow as effortlessly as Kallus’ did. 

Instead, what came out of Zeb’s mouth was worse than any truth he could’ve revealed. 

“You showed me how wrong the Empire was. And how much they really hurt people.” 

Zeb practically cringed at his words, ears falling back in embarrassment. 

Kallus took his hand off of Zeb’s and wrapped it around his leg once more. Zeb couldn’t tell if Kallus was hurt by what Zeb said, or if he knew that Zeb’s words weren’t true. Zeb wanted to take back what he said, but at the same time knew the truth would hurt them even more. 

The silence returned between the two of them, this one sitting much more awkwardly. Zeb couldn’t even dare look at Kallus in the eyes, the only thoughts running through his head were what he told Kallus. He wished all of this wasn’t so new and overwhelming. He wished he was able to say what was on his mind as easily as Kallus did, like how Zeb was able to before Kallus came around. Not that he wanted Kallus out of his life, he just wished he was able to tell Kallus how he felt. 

“I’m going to get some rest,” Kallus almost whispered, having the most nerve to break the silence. 

“Alright,” was Zeb’s response, knowing how out of character it was for him to even answer Kallus with words. 

Then Kallus stood up and left. 

Usually, their nights went differently, most of the time the stories resulting in some kind of banter. Then, Kallus would find some kind of physical excuse to hug Zeb, and Zeb would always hug back. After that first night, it had become an unofficial tradition between them. Over time, Kallus had learned to give more intimate hugs, usually burying his head into Zeb’s shirt and his breath slowed. Zeb engulfed Kallus, but liked holding onto something smaller than himself. In the moment, Zeb liked having something to protect.

They were always fleeting, but Zeb felt the weight of them. 

Something he was sorely lacking now. 

Zeb felt adrift, lost in the wind without Kallus holding him down. He missed the hugs between them, now bittersweet because he knew what they really meant. He didn’t even feel like he was sitting on the ground, instead he was running back to Kallus, telling him everything he said was completely wrong.

But his body stayed put. 

\- - -

Eventually, Zeb peeled himself off the ground and made the effort to head back to the base. The Ghost resided among the other ships tonight, so Zeb made his way to his familiar home. He was happy to head back to something he knew, something that reminded him about the times before all this. Zeb just wanted a distraction tonight, whether it be on the Ghost or through sleep. He had already spent so much time thinking about what he said. 

When entering the Ghost, the traditional evening bustle was still present. Kanan, Ezra, and Sabine were the first who greeted him, to which Zeb simply waved his hand and gave them a gentle smile. They seemed to know Zeb well enough as they gave him his space; Zeb responded like that when he was either tired or upset. Usually, he’s one to jump right into conversation without missing a beat when it comes to the Ghost crew. 

Zeb knew he wasn’t ready to go to bed just yet, but knew the energy of those three was something he didn’t need. He continued forward, eventually stopping at the sound of clanking and clicking coming from the cockpit. Hera was probably tinkering, making sure all systems in the ship were ready to go. She seemed like the person Zeb was most willing to talk to, so he made his way to Hera’s domain. 

“Hey Zeb,” Hera greeted warmly, waving a hand but not meeting his eyes as she was in the middle of a different task. 

“Hey. You don’t mind if I spend a while here?” Zeb clarified, making sure she wasn’t in the middle of any crucial work. 

After getting the okay, Zeb sat in his second row seat but didn’t fully relax. All of his thoughts were still preoccupied with Kallus; what he said to him, if he was okay, how much he wanted to apologize. It was rare when Zeb froze like that and didn’t immediately right his actions. However, Zeb spent a lot of his time in battle and not trying to build new emotional connections outside of the rebellion. While it had been awhile, and tonight was the first time things got that awkward between them, all of this relationship building was something foreign to Zeb. At least in Zeb’s context.

“Are you okay Zeb?” Hera broke his train of thought, standing right next to him with nothing but concern on her face. Zeb usually didn’t spend time in the cockpit like this to begin with, much less sat this quietly. 

He knew he could be honest with her. That was something that came naturally to him. But at the same time, the embarrassment almost kept his mouth shut. Almost. 

“No,” Zeb replied gruffly, not wanting to meet her eyes. 

Hera sat in the seat adjacent to Zeb, ready to ask him if he was willing to talk about it. While he didn’t feel ready, he felt like he needed to. 

“I messed up,” Zeb’s voice grew quieter, head and ears hanging low. His head found his way into his hands, still lost in embarrassment. 

“What kind of mistake are you talking about?” She asked, voice going up with anxiety. 

“Nothing with the rebellion. Something with me,” Zeb clarified quickly. The last thing he wanted was to worry her even more; he just needed someone to listen. 

Zeb exhaled, part of him wanting to keep this moment between himself and Kallus. He wasn’t up for revisiting it, but at the same time didn’t want tension to build between the two of them. The last thing he wanted for what they had, already fragile in how new it was, to break. 

“I like Kallus. Not as a friend.” 

Zeb felt like an awkward adolescent again, the words clumsily coming out of his mouth. When admitting it to someone else, it felt final. 

He liked Kallus. 

The confession sat, comfortable and large, while Hera took time to take it in. He wasn’t expecting her to know the right thing to say, or even to say anything at all. While the finality only grew, getting that off his chest was freeing in a way. Letting a secret like that fester for two cycles was something that he was going to have to talk about eventually. 

“Did something happen between you two?” Hera asked carefully, her words spoken slowly but concise. Hera was the kind of person that wouldn’t yell, but her level of concern was still there. His thoughts were veering on all sorts of paths he didn’t know were possible, all linking back up to Kallus not feeling the same way. 

“Sort of? I just…” he trailed off, the words he said to Kallus now a column of fire and thought towering over him. “I said something I didn’t mean. And I don’t think Kallus feels the same,” Zeb spoke practically in a whisper, his thoughts showing no sign of stopping. His head sat his hands now propped up on his legs, and the words never stopped berating him. 

You messed up. 

He doesn’t like you back. 

He just wants to be friends. 

“Did he tell you that?” Hera responded, making Zeb jump as if Hera read his mind.. Kallus never said anything, but Zeb just knew. Everything Kallus had done or said just made sense to him. It was nothing obvious, it was just how Kallus treated everyone else. Just simple mistakes. That’s just who he is. 

“No, but it feels like it.” The more Zeb spoke the younger he felt. This child-like vulnerability was a side of himself rarely touched or exposed.

“Zeb,” Hera sighed, and Zeb looked up at her. She looked empathetic, a worried but soft expression resting on her face as she leaned forward. “You won’t know until you ask. It’s so easy to assume but how he responds could surprise you.” 

Zeb’s gaze hit the floor once more. He wished it was that easy. If he could barely move from a gentle hand graze how would he be able to tell him how he felt? While part of him wished he told the truth, the other knows how it would go. He doesn’t think Kallus would be angry, but things would only be more awkward than they already were. No matter if Zeb told him or not, he knows there would’ve been a massive risk. 

“I’ve done this before. I understand how hard this is,” Hera tried again, voice faltering slightly. “But if he really cares about you, he’s not going to try and hurt you. All it takes is a leap of faith.” 

She wasn’t wrong. The only cost was the risk, but Zeb didn’t even know if the risk would be worth it in the end. But he did know Kallus cares about him, even if it isn’t the same way Zeb does. His affection towards him was proof of that. 

Ultimately he didn’t want to lose Kallus. 

Zeb looked back up at Hera and nodded his head in understanding. She smiled softly, looking happy that she was able to help him in some way. While the two have had plenty of moments and missions together, Zeb rarely went to her for personal matters and the two both understood that. Zeb had always trusted her, and he was grateful for her presence that night. 

“Thanks Hera,” Zeb expressed, their conversation slowly settling with him. 

“Of course,” Hera stood up, and Zeb did the same. She rested a hand on his shoulder, almost as one final check to make sure he was okay. But instead of returning the gesture, Zeb decided to pull her in for a hug. It felt right to him, like the best way to show his thanks to her. Plus the lack of affection that usually finished up the night was bothering him. 

She jumped from surprise but then quickly returned the hug. The moment itself was quick, much quicker then Zeb’s usual hugs from Kallus. Even though it didn’t last long, he could tell Hera appreciated the thought. 

When Zeb pulled away from her, her smile was still present and her eyes shone with appreciation. Zeb returned the smile back, and then made his way back to his room.

Zeb was happy he went to Hera, that he doesn’t have to hold the weight of his crush alone anymore. While he knew she didn’t have all of the answers, the advice she gave him he appreciated. And even though hugging Hera was nice and was another way to show he appreciated her, he missed Kallus. He missed their silent unplanned traditions, the excitement on his face whenever he was involved in a rebel mission, how in his hugs he practically clinged to Zeb like his life depended on it. 

Don’t get attached anymore, Zeb told himself. Stop thinking about him. 

Kallus made his choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please yell at Zeb for being a full himbo rn, this guy deserves it.
> 
> That Zeb and Kallus scene actually gave me second hand embarrassment when writing it lol. I hope I didn't portray Kallus as too suave, if I did it will definitely get cleared up next chapter.
> 
> AAAANNNDD, I'm currently a little over halfway through Season 4! Wish we got more canon Zeb and Kallus interactions but hey, gives me room to write this.


	4. Breeze

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kallus tried again, only shooting in the dark. “I just want things to be back the way they were.” “I do too,” Zeb replied, barely missing a beat. “I just don’t know if that’s what you want.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, here's the playlist I listen to while writing this fic! The "themes" for each chapter is just what song I listened to the most while writing it: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLpOmyT7u-E22aLl_mXpUpLp2ESjy1YhKv
> 
> Also I'll try my best to continue updates on the fic, but they might slow since I'm starting school again. Fic is not stopping though.
> 
> And I finished Rebels! I got spoiled about Zeb and Kallus awhile ago but it was nice to finally watch the scene! Seriously you cannot tell me they didn't get together 0_0
> 
> Enjoy! Try not to get too sad.

Kallus had cried himself to sleep.

He was never that much of a crier to begin with, but the realization of the events that happened the night before left him drowning. Kallus was absolutely terrified of coming on too strong, and he now knew he crossed the line. He really thought asking Zeb about that night would give him more answers, but instead it only prompted more questions and panic. So why did Zeb rest his head on his shoulder? Why did Zeb hug him back? Why did Zeb want to spend so much time with him?

For once in his life Kallus wanted to be honest. So telling Zeb what actually prompted him to leave the Empire was incredibly liberating. He just thought he was getting the same signals from Zeb, that Zeb maybe wanted something more. Kallus enjoyed hearing Zeb’s stories, and he liked spending time with him. Karabast, he loved spending time with him. During slow days at the base it was always his driving force to keep working. When Zeb told his stories, especially regarding the Ghost crew, he sounded like he was back there again, lost in the action and the thrill. His stories usually had some kind of happiness, whether it be droid shenanigans or another fight with Ezra. Kallus got lost in Zeb’s stories as much as the teller did, and Zeb never gave himself the credit he deserved.

Kallus was worried that he was going to make things awkward. The last thing he wanted was for Zeb to avoid him and for their friendship to be over. He couldn’t even imagine what that would be like. Zeb was the main reason he joined the rebels, and Kallus didn’t want to leave them. Zeb aside, he really enjoyed working for the rebels and agreed with the rebel cause. But he didn’t want his experience to get soured. 

There was more Kallus could’ve told Zeb about why he left the Empire. More insignificant details that meant the world to Kallus. For starters he kept the glowing orb the two of them shared on the moon.

Kallus never had a chance to figure out what it was, nor did he have the courage to let it leave his room. Even though he lived in the base like a ghost, one wrong look could have resulted in serious interrogation. What would he even tell them, that a surviving Lasat he happened to really like gave him it? It would’ve put a target on Kallus and the rebels, and it was something he didn’t want. 

The mysterious glow always helped Kallus sleep in his time at the Imperial base. In fact. he grew comfortable with the constant light that came from it. It reminded him of that night, and the time he spent afterwards, trying to understand what had even happened. 

After Zeb had left, the cold felt more bitter than before. Kallus stood with his back against the cave, thinking about Zeb offering his hand for Kallus to join the rebels. The last thing he expected was a rebel to treat him that fairly, for an enemy to become a friend. He wasn’t sure if Zeb understood what he did, leaning against him, resting his head on top of his. He remembered while Zeb was climbing the both of them up the icy cave walls from where they crashed, he felt comfort in clinging onto someone. While the stress of survival was prominent, Kallus knew that was when his feelings grew as well.

What clouded Kallus more than anything was a feeling of guilt. He could tell he freaked Zeb out, placing his hand on his and trying to get something started. Kallus always made the first move, difficult for his lack of experience, but he was more than willing. While Zeb sometimes delivered, he never returned the actions Kallus did. It made a little more sense, that the ice moon was just a special occasion. Just a one time thing.

Kallus couldn’t even get a break from his feelings in sleep; his dreams were clouded with losing this life, losing the base, losing Zeb. All he wanted was a break from his mistake, but everything in Kallus’ mind just proved as a reminder of what he did. 

When Kallus finally stirred, waking up in the dark bunker only felt unforgiving. He could never tell what time it was in the closed off room, but he could hear a handful of rebels gently snoring. He laid on his back, gaze fixed on the ceiling and mind lost in thought. All Kallus wanted was to apologize, to forget what happened between them and settle back into their comfortable friendship. Kallus knew would rather sit in unrequited love for the rest of his life than lose Zeb. 

He didn’t want to stay here. The room felt as cramped like the amount of thoughts berating him, unforgiving of his actions. All he wanted was a chance to breathe. 

Kallus carefully climbed out of the creaky cot, being careful not to disturb anyone sleeping nearby. He grabbed his jacket thrown on the foot of the cot, and headed towards the base entrance. 

Walking through the long corridors, Kallus tried to close up his dam of thoughts. His fears of losing Zeb kept seeping through, a wound Kallus didn’t know how to heal. He just wished he had a chance to talk to Zeb right there, telling him whatever he could to get him back. He wanted Zeb to know he completely cares about him, but if he needed to cover the depths of that care he was more than willing to. 

He tried not to go down the path of Zeb not forgiving him, but Kallus strayed. He didn’t know if Zeb was that kind of person, all he could do was hope he wasn’t. He knew Zeb was headstrong, but hoped he wasn’t someone who was driven by grudges and one time mistakes. 

The gentle morning glow of Yavin 4 greeted him, the sun just kissing the horizon through the trees. The sky was painted soft scarlet, blue sky growing more prominent as the sun rose. There were a couple of rebels finishing night duty, moving storage crates or checking ships, all of which Kallus greeted. This was the kind of morning Kallus needed, breathing in the crisp air that filled his lungs.

Kallus made his way to where he and Zeb sat the night before, the memories making his way back into his thoughts. He remembered how abruptly he left, and how he knew he messed up from Zeb’s response. While he wished he would have tried to conceal the awkwardness, the both of them needed time on their own. He could barely think about the hug he missed the night before, the close gesture once satisfying now memories becoming empty and cold. 

Kallus leaned his side against the stone pillar, letting his thoughts run about how he was going to fix his friendship. The last thing he wanted was to hurt it. He hoped he didn’t hurt it. He wanted a chance to talk to Zeb, even just to clear things up and take back everything he did. His words would remain; he believed them and wanted Zeb to know them. But his mistakes beat down on him, and he wasn’t even sure what moves were the right ones to make, or to even make any moves at all. 

He wanted to get lost in Zeb’s arms, to feel safe again.

Kallus stood while the sun rose, working out some kind of solution all on the chance to talk to Zeb again. The gradually growing bustle behind him was enough of a signal to start his day, breaking his focus and making him turn to take care of base maintenance. He glanced at the Ghost, sat quiet and unmoving alongside the other ships. He knew Zeb would be there, but Kallus had to take his time. 

Kallus ran through his morning routines; checking on systems to protect the base’s security, helping other rebels with storage shipments, going to short briefings on the missions and tasks of the day. He heard stirring of the Ghost crew going to Lothal, but had yet to hear any kind of confirmation. That is, until he was approached by Hera Syndulla. 

“Hey,” Hera greeted Kallus, catching him off guard while he was organizing supplies. Her tone was serious but friendly, definitely on business. 

Kallus greeted her back, and she dove straight into action. “I was wondering if you could keep watch of the Ghost with Rex. We’re going on a mission to Lothal and I trust you both to take care of it,” she explained briefly. 

The request through Kallus for a loop. He hadn’t spent that much time with the Ghost crew to begin with, and now Hera wanted him to take care of her ship? He wasn’t going to refuse, but was shocked at the trust he gained from her. 

Plus, it was a chance to see Zeb again. A chance to apologize.

“Of course,” he replied, smiling slightly. She returned the gesture and filled in Kallus on the more specific details of the mission. He stayed attentive, pushing away any stray thoughts. This was more than himself. This was about the rebels, about Ezra.

About Zeb. 

It was always about him. 

\- - -

Kallus caught his eyes first, watching Zeb march out of the rebel base doing who knows what. Most likely final briefings for the Lothal mission. While it wasn’t an official rebel plan, they had to be informed, something Zeb was good at making sure of. He seemed focused and alert, much more than what Kallus was used to. He tried to greet Zeb when he walked past, but he was only given a gruff mumble in response. He had no idea if Zeb even knew he was there, if he was ignoring him on purpose. Kallus understood the commitment Zeb had to make, but the lack of acknowledgement hurt. 

The rest of the Ghost crew flitted about, talking over final plans and preparations in subtle anxiety. Kallus could only stand back and let them do their work. He felt out of place on this mission; he didn’t even know Rex as well as the other rebels did. This felt like a family mission, a family that Kallus wasn’t a part of. A family Kallus wasn’t sure he could be a part of anymore. 

Zeb seemed the most dedicated of all, keeping his distance and making sure backup plans upon backup plans were set. The air hung a little more humid, only feeling heavier in Zeb’s absence. The more waiting he did, the more unsure Kallus was about how long he could wait for Zeb. The way Zeb felt was Kallus’ top priority, but his underlying patience was wearing thin. Maybe it was how deep Kallus was taking the pain, maybe it was the constant loop of the previous night. Everything was eating at Kallus, from his thoughts to the environment around him, and he wasn’t sure how long he could stand it. 

There was a moment where Zeb stood idle, no rebels to instruct or task to distract. It was the one shot Kallus had, to tell Zeb his piece before they left. 

Kallus paced his way as quickly as he could, not wanting to seem to panicked or suspicious. He hoped the anxiety didn’t read on his face or the impatience in his walk. 

“Hey,” Kallus cracked, almost sounding too cold for comfort. Zeb met his eyes quickly, seeming off guard that Kallus had approached him. 

“Hey,” Zeb exchanged, equally cold. The reciprocation hurt, and Kallus knew he had already stepped off on the wrong foot. He also knew he couldn’t step back. 

“Can I speak to you for a moment?” Kallus practically stammered, knowing the interaction wasn’t going as smoothly as he wanted. Zeb only nodded, expression reading unwilling. “Uh… I just wanted to apologize, for last night. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I just-”

“It’s fine,” Zeb responded quickly, walls up high and locked. 

“No, Zeb, it’s not,” Kallus slipped. Keep it together, Kallus tried to tell himself, immediately wanting to take steps back and retreat. But he had to keep marching forward. 

“Kallus, look, I-” Zeb stopped himself. His eyes got lost in his own thoughts, as if looking through his personal dictionary of what to say. Kallus braced himself. Zeb rarely used names, unless it was serious. Unless he really meant what he was saying. “I don’t know where this is going. I don’t know what you want with… me,” Zeb said slowly. He looked wounded, hurt, and vulnerable. And not in the same way as it was on the ice moon. It felt forced and unwilling. The last thing Kallus wanted. 

“Zeb, I’m sorry,” Kallus tried again, only shooting in the dark. “I just want things to be back the way they were.”

“I do too,” Zeb replied, barely missing a beat. “I just don’t know if that’s what you want.” 

The words hurt. 

Zeb doubted him. Zeb didn’t trust him. 

Kallus knew it hadn’t been long since they started their friendship. He wasn’t expecting everything to blossom immediately, but he also didn’t expect everything to go as well as it was. At least before this. Two cycles had resulted in a lot of thinking and hopping around ideas. Kallus had thought about futures that would be nearly impossibly, mentally spending more time with Zeb than he actually did. 

Kallus had no idea what Zeb wanted either. The last thing he was giving him was a clear answer, which Kallus had tried his best to give the night before. While he said he wanted their friendship to become what it was before, Zeb’s tone said otherwise. He sounded forced into the conversation, maybe even hurt. 

But Kallus had to keep moving forward. At least just to finish their conversation and give him space. Space he was terrified of how long it would last. 

“Zeb, that is what I want,” Kallus said sincerely, shooting in the dark. Shooting for anything. 

“Then why are you making it so hard?” 

Turns out he shot Zeb. 

Zeb had never yelled at him like this since their real friendship began. Sure, when they first met they did nothing but bicker, but the contents were never deep like this. They both had their walls up, but this time Kallus’ were crashing down. 

If the hurt didn’t read on Kallus’ face before it definitely did then. It reflected back on Zeb, who’s face immediately softened after realizing what he did. Kallus was only focused on fighting the floodgates. When had he become such a crier?

“I have to go Zeb,” the name left his tongue like an instinct. He didn’t take the time to look at Zeb. As quickly as the words left his mouth, he was gone. 

All Kallus realized was he was the one that needed space. He was playing with fire, a fire Zeb didn’t have in him. Kallus felt blind, an idiot for pushing himself and Zeb this far. All he wanted was one genuine friendship and he had already messed it up. 

You wanted more than just a friendship Kallus. 

Why did he let himself fall so hard before the cliff was even there? 

He wasn’t even sure what he wanted more; to be in Zeb’s arms or to run far away from them. Kallus was confused, not even sure what anything meant anymore in regards to Zeb. He wanted resolution, but the way he wanted it was where he was lost. 

The final shouts around him snapped Kallus out of his thoughts. The Ghost was preparing to leave, and Kallus reminded himself why he was here. If he couldn’t fight for Zeb anymore, then at least he could fight for a cause he believed in. A belief Zeb gave to him. 

The two were so interlocked, Kallus had to find a way to separate him. Zeb always comes to mind whenever Kallus thought about the rebellion, violet and green always finding their way into his associations. Kallus had to fight for something else, something other than a now impossible future. 

He had to let go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As if all the Lothal stuff wasn't any sadder. But hey, they weren't having any canon interactions during this, so might as well make a reason. 
> 
> This chapter is a little shorter than the others, but the next couple chapters are probably gonna be on the longer side. ;)


	5. Shadows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zeb didn’t know if Kallus’ feelings remained the same, but he couldn’t sit in the dark anymore. Zeb had to take a shot, even if he ended up wounded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, I really struggled with this chapter and I have no clue why. Probably cuz it was mostly sad and writing sad stuff is taxing on me. BUT I GOT MY GROVE.
> 
> Just wanted to mention this chapter discusses Kanan's death, but he was not a major character in regards to my fic.
> 
> Enjoy!

Lothal’s night sat with Zeb unsympathetically, cold wind feeling like a slap in the back rather than a familiar comfort. The rock he sat on provoked similar feelings, nothing feeling gentle in the bitter moment. He looked at the cold night sky as it only stared at him blankly as if it didn’t know how to comfort him. 

He had been one of the last in the Ghost crew to learn about Kanan, and all Zeb felt was helpless… and furious. Nothing sat correctly, thoughts running up and down about how he wasn’t able to save him, how he hadn’t even gotten a proper chance to say goodbye. All he did was tell a joke, taking for granted that he would return. They always returned, usually in one beaten down piece, and then built back up stronger and quicker. 

While Kanan was never a constant presence in Zeb’s life, he had always weaseled his way back in, and for good reason. Kanan helped keep the group on the ground and maintained control where Hera couldn’t. It was always nice to have him around, something that they had lost. 

Zeb didn’t know how Kanan had passed; the rest of the rebels refused to discuss it. Ezra and Hera were nothing but emotional, and Sabine stayed distant much like Zeb did. The last thing he wanted was to push them to speak. He knew how that went. 

Zeb’s time on Lothal had not been what he hoped. He wanted the familiar planet to provide some kind of internal resolve, but instead it only raised more stress and questions. The state of destruction and chaos reflected Zeb; nothing about Lothal was peaceful anymore. Much like him. 

Kanan being gone felt like the final insult. The people he cared about were leaving his life before Zeb had a chance to know they were gone. He knew how easy it was for him to take the blame. He could loophole to the point where Kanan’s death was his fault in some way. However, Zeb understood it wasn’t his fault. He wasn’t even there for Kanan right when it mattered. He had no choice. 

But it was easy to blame the Empire. Zeb felt they were in some way involved. In fact, he knew they were involved. Even though Kanan was the self-sacrificing type, he wouldn’t go this far unless provoked. And the Empire were the only people who pushed Kanan into taking that kind of action. 

Zeb had been thinking about the others he’s lost, more specifically the one who’s still alive. 

As if Zeb didn’t feel enough regret added from Kanan, Zeb had wanted to take back everything that happened before going to Lothal. At this rate, Zeb didn’t know if he was going to see Kallus again. Zeb’s walls were becoming too high to scale and too strong to knock down. Regret was the only thing fueling him, and now rage sat on top of it.

Thoughts of Kallus had haunted him during his time on Lothal. Any moment not spent on an important assignment had Zeb thinking about a chance to speak to Kallus. A chance to maybe tell Kallus how he felt. Even just a chance to say goodbye. With the rate things were going, seeing Kallus was becoming less likely and more terrifying for Zeb to let cross his mind. 

Zeb hoped he didn’t mess up permanently. After losing Kanan, the thought of losing Kallus as well only plagued him. He hadn’t listened to Hera, hadn’t listened to anyone. Why was telling the truth so hard for him? He didn’t have a problem when it came to the Ghost crew, but Kallus created walls in him he was desperate to destroy. It wasn’t Kallus’ fault; all of it came from Zeb. But he didn’t know how to stop it. He didn’t know if he created these walls to protect Kallus, or protect himself. 

When Zeb finally let his feelings towards Kallus run loose, they overwhelmed him, swallowing him whole and throwing Zeb in a world he didn’t know how to navigate. It wasn’t that they were bad feelings, and Zeb enjoyed all the time he spent with Kallus. But, Zeb never had felt these emotions before, and never this deeply. He wished it wasn’t so hard for his feelings to leave him, to take a plunge and tell Kallus everything. But Zeb’s fear took him by the throat and had no plans of letting go. 

Zeb tried to ground himself, bringing his thoughts back to the body on Lothal. The spindly plants tapping his leg, the gentle wind brushing against him, the soft night light. He couldn’t stay lost in his mind forever; there was still action to take. The kind of action was where Zeb sat indecisive. 

Between grieving Kanan and Zeb’s disappointment in himself, he was angry. Anything that had a chance of falling into place was now strewn to the side. He wanted a chance to right things, the ability to let everything out. 

Sitting there was not helping him. Sitting there and doing nothing but only let his thoughts eat at him. Just sitting and doing nothing felt like an insult to Kanan, and to Kallus. He had to clean his wounds, get up, and move on. 

He had to take it out on the ones who deserved it. The ones who started it. 

\- - -

Resolve had weaseled its way into Zeb’s heart.

Zeb and Sabine had taken their anger out on the Empire, letting them know exactly what they did. While spitting on the Empire felt good, Zeb’s emotions blinded him. His feelings towards Kanan, Kallus, and the Empire peaked in a whirlwind of punches, but Sabine held him back before the final blow. He had to take a step back. He had to look at his wrongs and try to right them, not create more. 

The Ghost crew was able to find some temporary peace in Kanan’s death; while it would take cycles to heal, they had a planet to liberate, and now in Kanan’s honor. It hurt, but it was pain they were willing to take. They weren’t alone, and that was the most comforting thought. 

While Zeb had calmed himself from Kanan, he still felt unsettled regarding Kallus. 

When his internal storm calmed, he realized lying to Kallus was a lie to himself. He could still be himself with Kallus; he didn’t have to create a fragile, elaborate lie to live on. The lies meant to protect himself only hurt the both of them; the good he thought he was doing was only destructive. He didn’t have to teeter when it came to Kallus. Kallus cared about Zeb, something he knew but constantly overlooked.

He didn’t know if Kallus’ feelings remained the same, but he couldn’t sit in the dark anymore. He had to take a shot, even if he ended up wounded. However, the idea of this shot was where his anxiety seeped in.

While these thoughts circled around his head, Zeb was mainly distracted on his way to save the Jedi Temple on Lothal. Ezra and Sabine had infiltrated the Empire’s digging site while Hera, Zeb, and Chopper sat guard. The three sat quietly, making sure Ezra and Sabine were alright, giving time for Zeb’s thoughts to creep in once more. 

He wasn’t going to let these thoughts control him alone.

“Hera,” Zeb started, getting her attention. She perked up, noting the seriousness of Zeb using her name. “I just wanted to say… thanks for listening to me, the day before we left,” Zeb stammered awkwardly, not really knowing how to start the conversation. He knew it was out of the blue, but there was no smooth entry. 

“Yeah, of course,” Hera replied, no questions asked. Chopper let out a confused chirp, to which Zeb glanced at him quickly. Zeb wasn’t sure if Chopper would go around telling the other rebels about his conversation with Hera, but the droid did have a heart, convoluted as it was. 

“I’m going to listen to it. ‘Cause I kind of… messed up, again,” Zeb nervously trailed off. 

“Zeb, what happened?” Hera asked cautiously, as if she was bracing herself. There was no softening this blow.

“I yelled at him. He was trying to apologize and I yelled at him,” he rushed out, ears hanging back at the unpleasant memory. She looked slightly confused, to which Zeb remembered he never gave her the full context of that night. “His hand accidentally went on top of mine and I just froze,” Zeb grew more embarrassed, not excited to give the details . “Don’t you say anything, Chop,” Zeb responded after hearing Chopper waver in confusion. 

Zeb exhaled, his deepest fears bubbling to the surface and leaving his mouth. “I don’t know if I’ll see him again. I don't want to lose him,” he practically whispered, voice slightly choking. It was a truth he knew but didn’t expect to feel this deeply. 

Hera sighed, sounding disappointed but not mad. “Zeb… I waited for a long time to tell Kanan how I feel about him,” she started, the name making the both of them slightly flinch and Chopper respond in a sad trill. While they had both resolved their surface level feelings about him, there was a lot of deep healing to be done, and Zeb couldn’t even imagine the pain Hera felt. 

“I waited until right before he was gone. When I told him, I realized all the time I wasted. Just because I was afraid. I was afraid of what telling him meant,” Hera stammered, taking a moment to breath. “And now I don’t know why I was afraid of that. I knew, deep down, that he felt the same. I don’t know why I waited so long,” her voice grew emotional and filled with regret, tears threateningly pricking her eyes. Zeb’s face softened in response to her, wanting to do whatever he could to calm her. 

“I don’t want you to do that too. I want you to have the chance at love that I didn't,” Hera stated, quickly trying to compose herself. 

The l-word struck a chord in Zeb. While he wasn’t ready to admit it, he knew he could grow to feel it. Zeb had never used that word when thinking about Kallus; his own emotions were already enough for him to handle. But he knew it was possible. It was a shot he didn’t want to throw away. 

Hera’s words sat with the two of them for a while, sinking into Zeb in particular. Zeb had never fully understood Hera and Kanan’s relationship, but her explanation filled in more gaps. Zeb knew there was something there, but didn’t understand where the two of them were. He didn’t want to pry, but Hera and Kanan’s kiss cycles ago only confirmed his suspicions. 

If anything, he was surprised Hera waited as long as she did. She was the one who always had a plan, ready to dive into anything with an open mind. This just proved to Zeb how powerful his fears really were, and strengthened Hera’s words. Zeb was thankful he went to Hera, to someone who had gone through the same struggles he was now. 

“Thanks He-” Zeb was quickly interrupted by the blaring alarms from the site. Looking back down on the site, he saw Sabine unmasked and exposed. 

Back into the fray. 

\- - -

While the Ghost crew wasn’t able to save the Jedi Temple, they had a chance to save the people of Lothal. In their plan of their final push to the Imperial Dome, there was some waiting time.

Zeb knew who he wanted to spend it with, but the problem was finding him. 

Kallus was on Lothal. Hera had managed to grab him and a handful of other rebels to help in their efforts. Zeb was surprised when he heard Kallus was on his way to the planet, but he also knew he wouldn’t back down from a mission. 

He had seen Kallus briefly when capturing Governor Pryce, but didn’t have the chance to talk to him. Kallus had immediately gone off to take care of issues regarding Pryce’s capture, not giving Zeb a chance to even approach him. Zeb couldn’t tell if he was upset at him, but he wouldn’t be surprised. 

All Zeb was concerned about was righting his wrongs as quickly as he could. 

As the rebels were preparing to hear the next stage of Ezra’s plan, Zeb spent his time helping where he could and looking for Kallus. It was hard to keep track of everyone in the bustle of the base, even though few rebels were there. Everyone was walking with anticipation, which Zeb reciprocated. 

A familiar flit of blonde caught his eye, and Zeb turned his head to see Kallus, speaking with fellow rebels Rex and Ryder. Zeb wasn’t surprised; as the three of them had provided backup for the first part of their plan. Zeb’s nerves grew, the reality of his situation weighing on him. He was going to tell Kallus how he feels.

And nothing was going to stop him. 

Zeb approached the three, feeling awkward entering their conversation. Thankfully, Rex and Ryder greeted him immediately, while Kallus stayed silent, only nodding his head in acknowledgement. He couldn’t read Kallus’ face; it sat in between hiding emotions and revealing them, somehow looking relaxed and uncomfortable at the same time. 

After some quick briefing about how their time was spent capturing Pryce, a lull in the conversation was enough wiggle room for Zeb to make his proposition. 

“I was wondering if I could talk to Kallus,” Zeb requested, glancing at Kallus quickly to see shock dash across his face. Rex and Ryder nodded their heads, as if giving Zeb approval. Bracing himself, Zeb turned his head to face Kallus, who only responded in a quick but defined nod. The two of them wandered off, Zeb taking the lead to find some semblance of privacy. 

Zeb found a tall rock holding up a part of the small canyon to act like a pillar to hide the two of them. When the two settled, Zeb’s anxiety continued to settle in. The only restraint he had to put on himself was to not lie, and to let Kallus know how he really felt. 

Kallus did not look happy to be there, the expression on his face looking impatient to leave. Zeb hopes this was just a wall, that Kallus still cared about him. That he didn’t mess everything up. 

“Look, Kallus, I’m really sorry,” Zeb rushed out, ears laying back quickly. Apologizing seemed like the best place to start. 

“Is that what you mean?” Kallus said decisively, barely missing a beat. While his words felt firm, his tone was soft, almost as nervous as Zeb was. 

“Yes,” Zeb replied, not wanting to stray Kallus. Zeb felt sure in what he was doing. More importantly, he was thankful to be speaking to Kallus again. Zeb wanted to make up for wasted time, and to eliminate time they could lose.

“Look…” Zeb trailed off, catching his train of thought. Don’t go too deep too quickly, he told himself, not wanting to scare Kallus off. Zeb knew was playing a careful game, a game he would do anything not to lose.

“I lied about some things. I lied because I was scared,” Zeb started. Impulsively, as if to match the weight of his words, he rested a hand on Kallus’ shoulder and looked at him straight on. It was not something in Zeb’s usual repertoire, but Zeb wanted Kallus to know what he was saying was the truth. 

Kallus jumped at the unexpected touch, but didn’t pull away from it. He met Zeb’s eyes, and Zeb was able to properly read his reaction.

He looked nervous, and vulnerable, like he did on the ice moon. But the last thing Kallus looked like he wanted to do was fight. His attentiveness was definitely at play, as Zeb could tell Kallus had backed down to let him speak. He looked young, eyes slightly wide with anticipation and at the same time looking to brace himself. Zeb could feel the tension in Kallus’ body; he was the furthest from relaxed.

“I lied because I was scared of losing you. Trust me, that’s the last thing I wanted,” Zeb cracked an awkward smile, trying to release some of the stress. While Kallus stood mostly resolute, he softened a little, the corners of his mouth pulling slightly. 

“I don’t know what you want, but I know how I feel. And it’s something I want you to know,” the anxiety panged at Zeb, suddenly building up knowing what he was going. Kallus’ head cocked slightly in curiosity, not prepared for Zeb’s confession. 

This all started from one night on that ice moon. That one night of connection led to all of this. The rotations spent thinking about him, all the time they spent together, and now this argument that had been eating at Zeb for cycles. This part in their relationship would come to an undeniable close, but the next page Zeb had no idea how to predict.

Second thoughts like shadows began to creep on Zeb, that he was moving too quickly and that he wasn’t ready. But he also knew he would regret it more if he stopped. He had run the furthest he could handle, to the point where the both of them were getting hurt.

The tension had built up long enough. 

“Look, Kallus, I want to be more than friends.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First time I've pulled a cliffhanger ending whoops. 
> 
> Next chapter will be the final chapter. And it should be on the long side, that's something I know for sure. Hopefully I'll have it up by the end of this week, no promises tho!


	6. Glow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So what are we doing? About us?” The question sat in the air, the both of them taking it in. Kallus was worried that the final part of his statement was said too soon. They had become us, not just Kallus and Zeb.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the final chapter oml 0_0. 
> 
> This fic just started as a JOKE IDEA and now I'm six chapters in finishing this thing. I've had a lot of fun making this my first project in 2021, plus it was so nice to get back into writing again. 
> 
> I'll have some more sentimental notes at the end of the fic, but for now enjoy the soft gay finale!
> 
> (Final scene is after the Battle of Endor btw, you guys know the scene :) )

Kallus was speechless. 

The last thing he expected today was this. 

Upon entering Lothal, he kept his distance from Zeb, not knowing if he wanted to be approached or not. Kallus was terrified of saying another thing to hurt him, and he didn’t know if their friendship was already gone. When Zeb came up to him, Kallus had no idea what his intentions were.

Turned out Zeb wanted to apologize. To actually apologize. While he struggled to find the right words, Zeb told him how he felt. Kallus knew he wasn’t lying based on how nervous he was. Kallus thought the most eventful thing in their conversation would be Zeb putting his hand on his shoulder, taking the initiative in their relationship for the first time. 

Kallus didn’t know what kind of thinking Zeb did when he was on Lothal, but Kallus definitely did when he was on his own. 

Kallus had wanted to do his own talking with him; he wanted Zeb back in his life. How he imagined how this conversation would start was where Kallus used to be lost. Thankfully, Zeb had made the first step. 

Now it was Kallus’ turn. 

He wasn’t going to lie to Zeb. This kind of confession was something he wanted to hear from Zeb, and was beyond happy he felt the same as him. But Kallus also understood the reality when this conversation was happening, and didn’t want it to go unnoticed. 

There was a battle to fight, people to help. While Kallus would love to get lost in his reciprocated feelings, he also knew where he needed to stand. 

“Zeb, I feel the same,” Kallus started, slightly smiling when he saw Zeb’s face light up. A relieved and shocked expression sat on his face, and Kallus considered maybe Zeb had no idea how he felt. Kallus had felt he was nothing but obvious, and Zeb didn’t feel the same. If anything, Kallus was expecting to have this conversation with Zeb. 

Zeb looked like he wasn’t prepared for this response either. When he made his confession, he was wincing, preparing for immediate rejection.

“Wait, what?” Zeb vocalized, his words finally catching up to his reaction. Kallus gently smiled, wanting him to know how real his words were. He decided to get lost in Zeb’s gaze, just for a moment. The small distraction was what he needed. 

While Kallus could tell Zeb was thrown for a loop, but at the same time felt stable in his own way. Ultimately, he felt like a force that wasn’t going anywhere, something that Kallus appreciated. Both of their running days were over. Kallus wanted to give Zeb as much as Zeb gave him.

The sudden rise and decay of a rebel voice snapped Kallus back to reality. While he’d love to stay in the bliss of the truth forever, Kallus had to remind both himself and Zeb of what was going on around them. 

“But, we’re in the middle of trying to save a planet. Trust me, I want to continue talking about this, but it’s not the best time,” Kallus stated, breaking his eye contact with Zeb briefly. 

The words sat with both of them, the brief silence balanced in the middle. The last thing Kallus said was a rejection. This was just putting the conversation on hold, waiting until they could both afford the time and the focus to talk about it. The back of Kallus' mind hoped Zeb understood, that he didn’t lash out and run away. However, Kallus knew those were just his anxieties talking and tried to tone them down the best he could. 

“I just don’t want to die before this happens. I’ve lost Kanan,” Zeb paused, and Kallus looked up at him. Zeb’s face had softened slightly at the mention of Kanan, obviously still needing time to process what had happened. Hera had mentioned Kanan’s death on the way to Lothal, something Kallus didn’t expect. He understood how close the Ghost crew was, and he couldn’t even imagine how the loss of Kanan had devastated them. While they seemed alright on the surface level, Kallus wanted to give Zeb the time he needed. 

“And I don’t want to lose you too,” Zeb finished, placing his remaining hand on Kallus’ shoulder. While he didn’t expect the gesture the first time, the second hand felt like a comfort.

Guess they both had the same fears. 

Zeb had said it before but this only cemented his feelings. All this time, they both didn’t want to lose each other. 

“I don’t want to lose you either. But we have to wait for now. Then we can talk,” Kallus caught himself, almost saying something else he wanted. But it wasn’t the time or the place. While they had found a secluded area, it wasn’t the most private place in the camp. They could still hear the bustle of others slowly growing, chatting about final plans regarding Lothal while the two of them were in their private world.

“Make sure to be back here then,” Zeb said, a hint of playfulness coming out. This side of Zeb was one Kallus was unfamiliar with nor expected after the emotional response he gave, but it made him smile. He played with the beatsa of their conversation, and it was cute. Zeb was cute. 

“Meet you tonight then?” Kallus retorted, playing along. While Kallus was joking, he ultimately hoped he could be with Zeb at the end of this. That the two of them would make it out alive. The mission was already risky, and right now what they had was good. Kallus didn’t want to lose it. He didn’t want to lose him. 

Zeb chuckled, soft and gruff. While the two had learned to grow vulnerable around each other in different ways, this softer version of Zeb wasn’t something he knew well. It felt genuine and real, no bars held and no need to impress or hide. And Kallus felt he was just beginning to learn this Zeb. 

The two looked at each other with resolve sinking in, and Kallus felt the conversation was coming to a close. Kallus already felt at peace with how everything went.

However, Zeb decided to pull another unexpected stop, as if to seal the deal. 

He pulled Kallus in for a hug, holding him tightly. 

Kallus jumped at the sudden gesture, but quickly melted into the hug from memory. Zeb’s strong arms were more of a comfort than a fear, the feeling of them gently holding his back silencing any of Kallus’ anxieties. Kallus rested his head on the soft cloth of Zeb’s shirt in habit, taking the feeling of being held by Zeb once more. He always felt safe in Zeb’s grasp, and he had longed for his touch like this once again. 

Kallus felt a lot more balanced, now that the two of them finally know how they feel about each other. He knew the conversation wasn’t over, leaving a residue of lingering thoughts. While they had both confessed, they hadn’t decided where this was going. There was still more talking to be had, but for now Kallus felt comfortable with Zeb.

The two stood hugging for a while, letting their emotions wash over them and settle out. Any remaining tension had dissolved, and Kallus finally felt at peace in the moment. While the wind whipped at their backs and the voices of others were still prominent, for once he didn’t care. He didn’t even care if they got caught; almost everyone knew they were friends anyway. He was just happy to be with Zeb. Happy to have him back. 

The growing calls of the rebels to gather everyone together was what finally broke their touch. They both knew the responsibilities they needed to take care of, and how willinging they were to do them. Kallus met eyes with Zeb once more, and the two of them smiled in unison, now knowing the feelings they both shared. 

Kallus could finally say with confidence that Zeb was not going anywhere. And neither was he. 

\- - -

The familiar glow of night had washed over Lothal, except this time a sense of glory joined the scenery. The rebels had eliminated the Imperial Dome from Lothal, in turn freeing the people of the planet and resulting in a massive rebel victory. 

Kallus was incredibly proud of the work he did, feeling liberated that he had finally driven out the people that had oppressed him for so long. And it felt good, finally giving the Empire the taste of their own medicine.

The mission had not been easy though, and sacrifices were made. Ezra had taken himself with Thrawn, giving the rebels very little hint of where he could be. They didn’t even know if he was dead or alive. The Ghost crew had stood appalled at Ezra’s sacrifice, taking the moment just to let the loss sink in. While they had pulled themselves together to finish the mission, the recovery afterwards was silence. No one in the rebel cell had lost hope, but the shock still stuck with them.

There was another moment, a moment that ran through Kallus’ head all the way back to the base when the mission concluded. When trying to destroy the dome, Kallus traveled to the shield generator to protect the people with a handful of rebels, including Zeb. However, at the appearance of Thrawn’s personal assassin, Zeb decided to throw himself into the fray to protect the others. 

The second Zeb sprinted to enter the action, every moment spent with Zeb flashed in front of Kallus. It was a chance at losing him, a chance to not finally tell him exactly how he felt. It terrified him, so much so that Kallus’ usually composed self had shouted and reached for Zeb. But he didn’t listen. After spending time thinking about the moment, Kallus didn’t hold it against him. Ultimately, Zeb’s risk proved helpful to the rebels and was a key part in the destruction of the Dome. But the unbridled action had scared him all the same. 

That evening, the rebels were doing anything except winding down. The party music ran rampant through the streets of Lothal, and the rebel base was no exception. The rebels were involved with each other, telling tales of where they were at during the base or just celebrating the victory, enjoying the moment of pure happiness. Those who hadn’t even spoken before the events of the day were chatting, arms wrapped around each other as if they had known each other for rotations. 

Zeb and Kallus decided to spend the night differently. When the festivities began, the two got subtly involved, eventually finding their way to each other. It was Zeb who proposed they moved away from the others, slightly smirking at the suggestion. Both excitement and anxiety ran through Kallus, knowing what was to come and was incredibly impatient for it. 

Eventually, Zeb found a secluded area near the edge of the base laced with rolling hills and small rock formations. They sat close together with backs to the party, staring at the gentle scenery and peaceful moonlight. Another night spent with Zeb, just the two of them. No distracting bustle or creeping anxiety. 

As if in new tradition, Kallus scooted closer to Zeb and rested his head on his shoulder. No surprise was received from the gesture, only the calm steady breathing from the Lasat. In a silent response, Zeb rested his head atop of Kallus’, and Kallus felt their blanket of safety snug around them.

Everything slowed; the elation of the victory had worn off and was replaced with peace. Kallus was exactly where he wanted to be, with Zeb after the battle. It almost didn’t feel real, that Kallus was actually with the rebels who were now succeeding, and with someone he actually cared about in ways he felt deeply.

Love was a word Kallus knew he felt regarding Zeb, but understood the weight of it. He wasn’t sure whether to offer it to Zeb in this moment between the two of them. It was something he was careful to admit to himself until recently. Zeb’s absence was what pushed him to the realization, the pain of unintentionally hurting him becoming too overbearing to label as just feelings. While Kallus had an urge to impulsively admit it, the majority of his thoughts were holding himself back. Just wanting to be at peace with Zeb. 

Zeb was the first to break the silence. “So what do we want to talk about?” The deep vibrating of Zeb’s voice above Kallus was comforting, only serving Kallus to fall deeper into Zeb’s touch. The question felt self-explanatory, an answer they both silently knew but were waiting for the other to confirm. 

“Isn’t it obvious?” Kallus slipped, tone slightly snarky and humorous. It wasn’t the most appropriate time for a joke, but Zeb still chuckled. He wanted Zeb to know what he was getting into, and while Zeb knew Kallus’ humor, he didn’t know it like the back of his hand. Not yet anyway.

“So I’m really going to have to deal with this now?” Zeb reciprocated with an equal amount of sarcasm. It was Kallus’ turn to laugh, enjoying the small banter between them. It was nice to have this back again, to have these kinds of conversations feel natural. 

Kallus knew where the conversation needed to go, and exactly where he wanted it to go. When the residuals of laughter had settled, Kallus gently veered the tone a different direction. 

“So what are we doing? About us?” 

The question sat in the air, the both of them taking it in. Kallus was worried that the final part of his statement was said too soon. They had become us, not just Kallus and Zeb. They had gone in too deep for the two of them to be addressed separately was how Kallus saw it. But the last thing he wanted was Zeb to get afraid again, to back out this far into all of this. Kallus didn’t want to scare him, but he wanted Zeb to know what he would like out of this. 

“I think I want to be with you, if you’ll let me,” Zeb stated, words coming out slow but decisive. 

If you’ll let me. It sounded like an unnecessary precaution, an unneeded buffer. Kallus almost scoffed, wanting to tell Zeb not to be scared, that he barely knew what he was doing too. He held himself back though, just to the point of necessity. 

“Of course I’ll let you Zeb, that’s not even a question,” Kallus didn’t miss a beat, not wanting Zeb to doubt himself. 

“So we’re doing this?” Zeb asked in disbelief, tone lowering as if his words were to himself. 

Kallus gently slid his head from underneath Zeb’s and lifted it up to face him. Zeb’s expression was nervous but excited, the corners of his mouth tilting up slightly and eyes shining warmly. But he looked ready. 

“Yes we are,” Kallus responded, borderlining a whisper. He smiled back at Zeb, whose features were growing more soft, any kind of edge disappearing. 

So it was official. They were together.

Even though no one else knew, the finality of being together sat with the two of them. It wasn’t a bad feeling in the slightest; all the confused and overthinking had finally come to a resolution. Everything around Kallus felt like a comfort, from the gentle breeze brushing past them to Zeb’s steadily breathing body next to him. 

Zeb looked to be just at peace as Kallus was. The two were locked in eye contact, faces close but not touching, and it felt anything but pressured. Kallus was just enjoying the view, studying the Lasat that was now his. Kallus wasn’t used to the thought, but knew he would be soon.

Kallus’ thoughts wandered while looking at Zeb, to something he hadn’t considered to be reality until now. Kallus’ choices rolled in his mind, wondering if he should make the move that rarely graced his thoughts but knew it was something he wanted. He barely considered it before due to the state the two of them were in and how unlikely Kallus felt it was, but the more Kallus got lost in Zeb’s gaze, the heavier the option weighed. 

Then he decided to take the plunge. 

“Can I kiss you?” Kallus asked, the question leaving his body softly. 

Zeb’s response was immediate and effortless. “Yes.”

The two leaned in until their foreheads bumped gently against each other, Zeb’s hand moving to cradle Kallus’ face. He slightly leaned into Zeb’s touch, comforting and warm. Kallus met eyes with Zeb one more time, just to make sure he was alright. He looked ready for this, looking back at Kallus with equal warmth. 

Then they fully leaned in, lips finally touching.

The kiss was soft; amateur but not awkward. Kallus’ eyes gently closed, becoming fully lost in Zeb’s touch. His thoughts barely whispered, nerves declining the deeper they got. It felt nothing but right, intimate, and needed. 

Eventually, Zeb was the first to break away for air, as the two had fully lost regard for their surroundings. However, they still stayed close, not wanting to fully leave the intimacy. Kallus had kissed him, and the two were actually together. A soft wave of excitement washed over Kallus, the feelings gently cracking through a soft smile. 

“What are you smiling about?” Zeb asked gently with a tinge of playfulness. 

“You,” Kallus knew the line was unoriginal as it left him, but it was only the truth. All he could think about was Zeb, both with him next to him and the times they would have together.

Zeb chuckled, not rejecting the line. In response, this time he rested his head on Kallus’ shoulder. “This seems to be our thing now,” Kallus commented, voice quiet but getting another soft laugh out of Zeb. Kallus then rested his head on top of Zeb’s, now accepting the new tradition.

The silence settled between them once more, each moment becoming increasingly more comfortable. Kallus let his eyes scan the rolling hills of Lothal, the speckled stars meeting the horizon, the small rock formations jutting from the ground. While the land was vast, it was homey. Something Kallus knew he now had. 

The idea of love graced Kallus’ thoughts. About putting the two together, combining his feelings of Zeb into one concise sentence. A phrase the more he thought about it the more he wanted to exchange it. The more he wanted Zeb to know how he really felt. He didn’t want Zeb to feel rushed, but the moment was absolutely perfect. He and Zeb were together, after having their first kiss under the starlight of a rebel victory. 

It sat right with Kallus. The risk felt worth it. 

“Zeb, I l-”

“Don’t. Not yet,” Zeb interrupted, as if he knew what Kallus was going to say. 

Surprised, Kallus removed his head from the top of Zeb to look at him. Unexpected by the movement, Zeb followed suit, and Kallus could see the slight smirk on his face. “Wow, you’re really going to make me wait Zeb?” Kallus retorted, tone half-joking but his smile quickly growing.

“Yup,” Zeb said, placing his head back on Kallus’ shoulder mockingly. Now grinning, Kallus placed a quick kiss on Zeb’s head before resting it back on top of his. If Kallus had to wait to tell Zeb the words he longed to say, then he could at least express his feelings through the tender action. 

But Kallus could wait for as long as he needed to. He wanted Zeb to feel comfortable, to not run away from the intimacy of their relationship. It seemed less likely though, with Zeb finally loosening up after telling Kallus how he felt. What they had right now was more than enough, and it was perfect. 

Kallus was more than excited to see what was next, now that he knew he would no longer be alone. He finally had a family. 

\- - -

“Alex! Alex, we’re here!” Zeb’s excitement woke Kallus, who was sprawled out on Zeb’s chest. Their room was still dark, the only light coming from the device Zeb had to mark their travel. Kallus groaned from the sudden wakeup, eyes barely open and body slowly coming to. 

“C’mon, just a couple more clicks,” Kallus jokingly complained, hugging Zeb tighter and making him struggle as he tried to get out of bed. 

“Alex, please,” Zeb whined, returning the bit Kallus had started. Smirking, Kallus lifted his head and rested his chin on Zeb, slowly opening his eyes. 

Zeb was smiling, looking at Kallus and impatiently waiting for Kallus to get off of him. Kallus loved the way Zeb wore excitement, how his eyes were a little wider and his smile a little bigger. 

“Can I get a good morning at least?” Kallus teased, lifting himself up to meet Zeb’s face. While he didn’t know the time, neither of them seemed to care. Zeb gently grasped Kallus and pulled him forward for a kiss. 

While the kiss was groggy from the both of them recently waking up, it was filled with their typical tenderness and passion. Kallus tilted his head, letting Zeb take the lead due to Kallus’ exhaustion. 

Kallus was the first to pull away, opening his eyes once more to see Zeb. He always looked at Kallus like he had fallen in love with him again, never ceasing to make Kallus grin himself. “Now I’m awake,” Kallus whispered, making Zeb beam once again. 

“Let’s get dressed, then I’ll take you to the bridge,” Zeb stated, the excitement soaked in his words. Slowly, Kallus peeled himself off of Zeb in order to let the Lasat ready for the day. 

Kallus took a moment to watch Zeb effortlessly throw on his clothes, movements slightly rushed in his excitement. Kallus never failed to notice how handsome Zeb was; even doing the simplest tasks Kallus always found something to observe in Zeb. He loved doing it, and Zeb never minded. 

Kallus tore himself from the warmth of their bed and slowly approached Zeb from behind, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his head on Zeb’s shoulder. Kallus breathed, taking in Zeb’s smell still heavy from the morning. Zeb stopped his actions and set his hands where Kallus’ were, leaning into Kallus’ touch. 

“Love you Zeb,” Kallus stated, the words now familiar between the two of them. 

“Love you too,” Zeb responded, words laced with equal tenderness. 

Kallus let go of him and got himself ready for the day while Kallus tried to pry at Zeb about where he had brought Kallus. After the Battle of Endor, Zeb told Kallus there was something he wanted to show him, something he had spent rotations thinking about but couldn’t take Kallus just yet due to the rebellion. Truthfully, the anticipation had been eating at Kallus as well. While Kallus himself was excited about this mystery trip, he had no guesses to where Zeb wanted to take him. Zeb refused to give any kind of hints as much as Kallus asked, only telling him he knew it was going to love it. 

The two exited their room together and Kallus laced his hand into Zeb’s, fingers fitting perfectly in between his. Zeb’s firm grasp was always a massive comfort to Kallus, Zeb’s larger hands slightly engulfing Kallus’. He didn’t mind though, in fact he enjoyed the protection he felt. Zeb always made sure Kallus was safe, even when he knew Kallus could hold his own. Something that was evident even in simple affection. 

They greeted the few people they encountered on the way to the bridge. While the ship was large, only a small handful of passengers and crewmates resided in it, leaving Zeb and Kallus feeling like it was just the two of them most of the time. When they noticed the big doors that would lead to the bridge, Zeb stopped, moving to stand in front of Kallus. 

“Make sure you have your eyes closed until I tell you to open them,” Zeb instructed firmly, tone serious but his expression said otherwise. Kallus only nodded his head, studying Zeb’s growing grin. “Close your eyes,” Zeb stated, chuckling at Kallus. He quickly closed them, smiling from the simple mistake. 

Zeb let go of Kallus’ hand and placed it on his shoulder, guiding him forward down the hall. Kallus noticed a small increase of footsteps behind him, but knew better than to turn his head. As an extra precaution, Zeb placed his other hand over Kallus’ eyes, the additional touch which Kallus liked. The bridge doors opened and shut quickly, and Zeb’s pace slowed to a stop with Kallus following suit. 

“Alex, I wanted to show you that we’re not all gone. I wanted to show you that you weren’t wrong,” Zeb then removed his hand from Kallus’ eyes, and Kallus opened them.   
What Kallus saw was his future. The future he had longed with for so long. 

Family. Love. And Zeb.

Everything they both wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (TL;DR: thanks for reading and all the support guys, just wanted to ramble bout some writing things. go follow me on insta @cosmicacti! (I'm workin' on a webcomic :D ))
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has checked out and kept up with the fic! This thing has become a 51 page monster on google docs, a monster I'm quite proud of.
> 
> I tried my best to make the dialogue as accurate as I could to the show, like stuff Zeb and Kallus would say. Of course, it was hard, since the only dialogue like this I had to go off of was the ice moon stuff, but I think I did a decent job with what I had. 
> 
> Also I need to mention that writing Zeb as a dense, chaotic, gay disaster was SO FUN. In the comments I could tell you guys liked the torture I put him through too lol. And writing Kallus as a more calm and cautious gay was great too. Had to make them contrast in more ways than one.
> 
> I kept the kiss scenes slightly vague btw, because I wanted to leave some of the specifics to imagination ;)
> 
> But thanks seriously to everyone who has read and supported the fic! It means so much as my first writing piece I've made public, and I am incredibly proud of what I wrote. Feel free to follow me on Insta @cosmicacti since I'm working on a webcomic so I'll definitely cover more writing stuff there too! Thanks again guys! <3

**Author's Note:**

> For those you made it this far, thanks so much, hope you enjoyed!
> 
> If you guys wanna check me out in other places, I'm on Instagram, YouTube, Twitter, and Amino @cosmicacti! I mainly post art stuff on there if you guys are interested.
> 
> Thanks again for anyone who checked this out! <3


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